afraid

I don`t know. It`s like every night, before I go to sleep, I`ll draw the curtains but I`ll ALWAYS leave a gap & not draw them fully, just so I can see the rays of the Sun shining through the next morning. It`s like I know I`m still alive, that I`m able to live & experience a new day, just as long as I leave that gap. I know, totally silly. & it`s like a representation of my heart - I can`t move on totally. There`s like this gap meant just for you. To walk on, to fly above, whatever, just as long as you make your way back. Someday, somehow. The gap will always be there, it`s like a path or runway for you. Just you. But I`ve been too hopeful & I think it`s about time I learn to live with the 'possibility' of 'never, ever'. It scares me. Alot. It really does.

The sun`s going to shine, & the rain`s going to fall, & in the end you might get burnt or wet, but that`s life. So dance in the puddles and bathe in the sun, and at the end of the day, just smile. Everything`s going to be all right, Fit. Everything. single. damn. thing. So chin up, supergirl. Aren`t you supposed to be strong, Fitriyanna? =\